As you read this, imagine the voice of the Pink Panther as played by Peter Sellers …
As you pull into the gas station … Thinking of the numerous things that could and probably will go wrong … You are very surprised to see that no other cars are there … So you take a couple of seconds and pick the one best for your exit … As you pull up and stop , you see a little flag type sticking out of where your credit or debit card would go … Saying “out of order” … Then angrily, you get back in your car and go find a pump that actually works and you manage to get some gasoline in your car … Then as you look for your receipt, upon the screen pops up … SEE CASHIER … Immediately you become infuriated … So you head inside only to be greeted by fifteen customers ahead of you … Each of them having everything from beer to milk and bread and other junk foods and order pizza and hot dogs once they do get to the front, also of course ordering a big nasty soda … Somehow you persevere and make it to the front to finally get your receipt … All of a sudden the attendant punches out of her cash register and heads to the back saying “I will be right back … I have to use the bathroom” … And just like that you realize you have a bad nosebleed and a horrible headache … She finally returns and makes a smart aleck remark about your bleeding all over her cash register area … You remain calm enough to say to her “I just want my damn receipt” … She goes to get your receipt and realizes the register is out of paper … My nose is hemorrhaging so bad at this point I just walk out the front door … So I ask you, does Satan run all gas stations? …
Frankie The Earthman 