Hello, yes this is Penish Potato … Oh … “You’re an insurance agent? Yes I know, everyone says that it is a very unusual name … Yes you pronounce it just like it is spelled and sounds … PENISH … Yes that’s right just like penis except add an ‘h’ at the end” … By the way, only about ten thousand of your agents have called me of late but I am getting rather sick of it … Sometimes I wonder if the whole lot of you don’t have rocks and sand in your heads … Anyway I think you get my point … So at the beginning of our conversation, you asked me “how I am doing” … Well, I tell you what I will make a deal with you, I will tell you how I am, if you will answer one question for me … Do you ask me ‘how I feel’ out of obligations to your job … a mere formality, or do you sincerely care really how I am doing?… Because that would be the type of thing that is very important to me … So … About how I am doing … It’s not been a good day so far … I fell down the steps this morning … That is the steps that go down about one hundred yards to our underground system in the mountain where we live, it is quite extensive … We have a shelter … There is a library within the shelter and there are many adjoining rooms such as the bathroom and kitchen … So as I fell, I hit my head several times on the concrete wall and flooring … I was sprawled out on the floor for two hours as I had a compound fracture collar bone … Both eyes were black, a cracked rib and a broken arm … Also … One nostril was filled with blood … My dog vigorously licking my face finally brought me around … Then I managed to crawl back upstairs … But I could barely breathe … So I took a couple of extra-strength Excedrin and feel a little better, not so dizzy anymore … So please tell me how you are doing, then we can talk about life insurance … … Frank Payton … As you read this … Imagine the voice of the Pink Panther ( Peter Sellers )… A little more nasal sounding …

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