First of all, I must say that this is a very unusual, “original street game.” Here are the rules and recommendations to get full enjoyment out of this unheard of game, ( I know this to be true because I just created the game): It is highly recommended that this game be played on a nice field of grass, preferably short grass, like the green of a golf course. This or other available “soft” surface would be preferred over a concrete or wooden surface, as you will see.
It is also recommended that the game be played with only two contestants and two accompanying judges, one to ‘watch’ each contestant, and tally the actual “licks” on the “beetle type bugs.” If more than two contestants, including judges, are attempting to play this game, it can become rather chaotic and hard to keep track of, and fans will become disinterested. This is why it is recommended that only two contestants play at a time. It is also recommended to hire vendors to sell hot dogs, drinks, candy for children, and other concessions. Also, maybe have some Johnny Blue portable conveniences for the convenience of all. ( Digging a hole and having people doing their business in full public display will put a damper on the whole event.) Also, it would probably attract the law.
Having followed these directions, one is sure to put on a very successful Licky Bug contest. Now, the details of the game itself. There is a starting line and a finishing point that can really be of any distance. Twenty to forty yards is recommended. Many can participate during the course of a gathering.
Someone, preselected and dependable, provides a jar of healthy June bugs or similar bugs. The contestants get down on their hands and knees, with about ten feet in between one and the other contestant. One judge accompanies each contestant down on hands and knees. ( The judge crawls along,“head down and tilted, eyeballing” closely beside the contestant and records the actual number of licks the contestant accomplishes.) Note: Judges should be able bodied and younger, having good eyesight, and also able to make a strike on a piece of paper for each lick accomplished. This is not the game of horseshoes, so “near licks” do not count. The first contestant to cross the finish line with at least fifty licks is the winner. So, there you have a new game for the masses.
This short story is written entirely by Frankie The Earthman. As I was writing this, I couldn’t help thinking of the humorous style of Samuel Clemens or the bizarre style of Edgar Allan Poe.